Brutally honest. Surprisingly useful.

Your Website
Needs a Roast

AI-powered website reviews that don't sugarcoat. Design, copy, UX, SEO, conversions — we'll tell you what's broken and how to fix it.

Roast My Website — $19
500+ sites roasted Report in minutes Money-back guarantee

500+ websites roasted and improved. Yours is next.

How It Works

Three Steps to a Better Website

No calls. No agency fees. Just brutal honesty delivered to your inbox.

1

Enter Your URL

Drop your website link. We'll crawl the key pages and screenshot everything.

2

Pay $19

Secure checkout via Stripe. No subscriptions, no upsells, no BS.

3

Get Your Roast

A detailed, actionable report lands in your inbox within minutes.

What Gets Roasted

Six Areas. Zero Mercy.

Every roast covers these categories with specific, actionable feedback.

Design & Visuals

Is it 2026 or did your designer time-travel from GeoCities? We'll tell you.

Copy & Messaging

"Welcome to our website" is not a headline. Let's fix your words.

User Experience

If your nav needs a tutorial, you've already lost. We'll map the confusion.

SEO Basics

Google can't rank what it can't understand. Let's see if you're even findable.

Conversion Killers

You're getting traffic but no sales? Yeah, we'll find out why.

Trust Signals

No testimonials, no about page, stock photos everywhere — we see you.

Preview

What a Roast Looks Like

Here's a taste. The real thing goes way deeper.

Sample Roast — acmecorp.com

Overall Score: 34/100
Homepage Hero
Your headline says "Welcome to Our Website" — congratulations, you've told me absolutely nothing. I still have no idea what you sell, who it's for, or why I should care. A confused visitor is a bounced visitor. Try telling people what you do in under 5 seconds.
Call-to-Action
Your CTA button says "Submit". Submit what? My will to live? Make it specific: "Get My Free Quote" or "Start My Trial." Also, that gray button on a gray background? Chef's kiss of invisibility.
Trust Signals
No testimonials, no reviews, no logos, no team photos. You're basically asking people to hand over their credit card to a ghost. Would you buy from a store with no sign on the door? Neither will they.
Ready?

Time to Face the Music

Your website might be costing you customers. Find out what's broken — and how to fix it.

Get Your Roast

Actionable feedback delivered to your inbox in minutes.

Secure payment via Stripe. Report delivered via email.

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